Coupla Things...

First, Bob found a cool way to support our servicemen. I'll let him talk about it:

I know the "Affliction" t-shirts, made popular by the UFC, are very popular right now. I am not a fan because it is mostly douche bags too afraid to get tattoos that are wearing them (Ed you are obviously excluded from that category), but some of the designs are at least artistically interesting. Well, while on the Crossfit site today I came across a website called OperationPhoenix.com, which led me to another website Forgedclothing.com. Both of these sites had similar styles of t-shirts, but with INFINITELY better causes. Operation Phoenix is a non-profit selling these t-shirts, and taking donations, to provide the United States Marine Corps with functional fitness equipment for training. A very good thing to say the least. Forged clothing was formed by a group of former Navy Seals, and all there clothes are designed off of military insignia (with artistic liberties taken) from Seal teams and various other military branches. Forged has certain shirts that are sold with 100% of the profit going back to the families of servicemen killed in action. My understanding is that all t-shirts donate some of the profit to military families. I figure if you want a trendy cool t-shirt why not get one that is helping the cause instead of putting more money in Dana White's pockets (God love him, he's a good capitalist).

So there you go. There are some really good designs out there, and as Bob said, it's for a great cause. Think Christmas gifts people!!!

* Further proof that Chad Ford--basketball writer for ESPN.com--is a fucking idiot. And I quote, after the Iverson/Billups trade: "Whatever you want to say about Joe Dumars, the guy isn't afraid to take risks. Some of them, like drafting Darko Milicic, a little-known 17-year-old, have backfired (though swapping Milicic for the right to draft Rodney Stuckey has mitigated that decision)."

To put into context, Chad Ford was the one who enthusiastically supported the drafting of both Nikoloz Tskiafhailgjeaioefjaealb;jbao (yes, the semicolon is part of his name ;-P ) and Drako Milicic. In fact, Chad Ford was the last person in the world to admit that Darko was a bust, holding out on him for five or six years. So now that he has been absolutely FORCED to admit that Darko was a bust, what does he do? He tries to paint a pretty picture by saying the Darko for Stuckey trade made it all good.

We're going to ignore how pathetic that is Chad. Instead, we're going to go with your statement. So you'd rather have Rodney Stuckey than...Chris Bosh? Carmelo Anthony? Dwyane Wade? David West? BECAUSE THOSE WERE THE PEOPLE WHO WERE DRAFTED AFTER DARKO CHAD!!!!

Stop trying to look like you're not an idiot Chad. You are. Accept it, and move on.

* Quick question to Netflix: is there a single web site in the world you don't have a popup ad on? Just wondering.

* I can't decide if if this story is sad, or has a silver lining of, "Oh well, at least he went out on top." I'm going to go with the latter. Congrats on reaching the top of the mountain buddy; I'm glad you went out on top!

* News flash to Mike D'Antoni and Donnie Walsh (both of whom I respect and think are geniuses): In the "NY Knicks v Stephon Marbury" battle, Stephon will win. Make no mistake. He has no pride; he is perfectly happy sitting on his ass all season and collecting $30million. You will not be able to buy him out. Just so you know.

* Two thoughts on this story: 1) Dude, they have regulations for a reason. That some Darwinism there. 2) Wait...you mean Ligers are real? I had no idea! I thought that was a Napolean Dynamite thing!

* Not that I have any room to talk as a Mavs fan, and not that I like to agree with John Hollinger, but man the Spurs are going to suck this year. And not to toot my own horn, but you heard it here first. Just, you know, ignore that Mavs' prediction.

* So I watched the CMAs (Kim's idea, not mine) the other day. Once again, I found myself praying the prayer that I pray every day:

Lord God, let me thank you--as I do every day--for making me a Man, and not a Woman.

Why, you ask? Because I watched Carrie Underwood change clothes at EVERY SINGLE COMMERCIAL BREAK, and Brad Paisley not once changed out of his jeans and sloppily fitting jacket.

Fellas, we've got it good.

* Finally, my last two topics are pretty serious--one being sad, and one being happy. We'll deal with the sad first.

One of the most influential people in my life died on November 4th. Michael Crichton died at the too young age of 66 from a private and unexpected battle with cancer.

Simply put, Michael Crichton is one of the greatest writers and authors (I see a distinction between the two) who ever lived. He is the author of an incredible number of classics: The Andromeda Strain, The Great Train Robbery, Eaters of the Dead, Congo (don't judge the book by the movie; the book is fantastic, the movie is one of the five worst of all time if not the worst), and of course, Jurassic Park. He is also the creator of ER, and has directed several movies. His works are exceptional, and several of his books I have read over 20 times each.

Crichton was a genius (literally; he graduated summa cum laude from Harvard, and got his MD from Harvard Medical School) whose greatest talent was teaching the reader about the science his book dealt with. Time travel, cloning, genetic research, weapons manufacturing--Crichton not only told you fantastic stories about each, but taught his readers the basics so they could follow his work and enjoy his stories more readily. He made complex scientific topics more sensible to the average guy.

Crichton was one of my foremost inspirations into the world of SciFi, and the world was a better place with his work in it. He was a brilliant man, and will be missed.

* Finally, I have to give a shout-out to Gangstalicious. We recently became back to back Champions of Carrolton's Sunday Night Basketball League--one of the most competitive rec leagues in Dallas. There are so many great players who have played on our team--both those on it now and some of the guys who have had to move on--and while there are fantastic things to say about everyone, I've got to give a special shout to without question our MVP, Chris Bishop.

I've been blessed to play with some of the best players in the world in my life--literally, as several of them are or have been in the NBA--and I would rank Chris right up there with them. Chris is an amazing all around player--an unstopable scorer, a great defender, an underrated passer, a fantastic competitor, a great leader--but what truly sets him apart is his play in the open court. If Chris gets the ball on a fast break, there is an 80% chance that he is going to score or get fouled. Think about that for a minute--the best shooters in the NBA shoot 50% from the field. The fact that we can count on Chris at least 80% of the time--even if he's outnumbered 2 to 1--is simply amazing. The two best open court players I've ever played with are Chris and former NBA Dunk Champion and current OKC Thunder SF Desmond Mason. That's how good Chris is.

People, there are a lot of reasons to come watch this team--David & Bryan's amazing shot blocking, Suki's dizzying play at PG, Sam's back breaking 3 pointers (the "Oh my God, did that 6'5" white boy just hit his third three on us?" look on opponents faces never gets old)--but the excitement you get from watching Chris get the ball on a break, knowing he's going to score, and just wondering how he's going to do it is well worth the price of admission--assuming, of course that there is a price of admission, which there is not. :-)

So congratulations to Gangstalicious for an outstanding feat by being back to back champions. If you want to see some good, free basketball on a Sunday evening, come on out. I promise you'll enjoy yourselves.

The Last Word on the Sarah Palin Experience

I wanted to write about this topic after the election, but I didn't because I wanted to stay positive about the many good things that happened. However, it's a topic that needs to be addressed, so we'll discuss it now.

The media and the Republican Party's treatment of Sarah Palin has been absolutely revolting.

We crossed the line from the normal bullshit "this is the candidate we don't like" coverage to just plain petty, spiteful, and untrue. Allow me to address these topics one at a time:

* The claim that Palin didn't know that Africa is a continent is riGoddamndiculous. She's the Governor of Alaska. She's a fucking college graduate. She knows what a continent is. Shame on you.
* The whole shopping spree thing...first of all, I'm doubting she spent as much money as they said she did. For the sake of argument, however, let's say that she did. WHO FUCKING CARES? She's the first female VP candidate! She needs to look her best at every minute of every day. Really, you don't think men aren't going to judge her on her appearance? You don't think women are going to judge her on her appearance? What woman do you know that doesn't read Cosmo, Elle, Allure, or some other fashion mag? NONE!!!! THAT'S ALL WOMEN DO IS JUDGE OTHER WOMEN BY THEIR APPEARANCE! Sorry ladies...but if Palin has proved anything, it's that the toughest glass ceiling a female politician is going to have to crack is the one that her fellow girls built over her head.

And as for buying the rest of her family clothes...really? You don't think she should have done that? What was the first issue on her campaign: her family and the issues therein. In today's "What's Lindsey Lohan's sister wearing today" world, you don't think it was necessary for all of her family to dress well? Listen you faukers, you're the ones who go out and buy fashion mags nonstop, and watch E! News and What Not To Wear and all that crap. THIS IS THE SOCIETY THAT WE CREATED, AND WE HAVE NO ONE TO BLAME FOR IT BUT OURSELVES. So please, let's not penalize the lady for going out and buying the most expensive clothes for her and her family, because yes, we would hold it against her if she did not do so.

* The answering the door in the towel thing. So apparently here's what happened: two McCain staffers came to her hotel room to speak to her about strategerie, Palin answered the door in the towel wrap--you know, just like we've all seen a million women do in our lives--told the guys to come on in and chill with her husband in the living room area while she finished getting ready. Apparently these two yes men were flabbergasted by this.

Hey yes men: FUCK YOU!!!

This is one of the most sexist things I've heard of in a long time. How is this an issue? So McCain and Obama never did an interview/discussed strategy while working out with their shirt off in the gym? Never discussed politics in the locker room, or the steam room, and they never had to let someone into their room right after the got out of the shower?

If I had to guess, I would say that candidates are working what...20 hours a day? At least? Probably about the only sleep they get is on the plane/bus from place to place. So I'm sorry, I have no problem if Palin...or McCain...or Obama...or Biden...answer the door to their rooms in their towels, and tell THEIR FUCKING STAFFERS to go into the other room and wait for them to get ready. I admire the hard work all four of them put in during this difficult season. To claim that Palin was doing the most to maximize her time is somehow inappropriate is just ridiculously sexist.

As for the Republicans, I have news for you. Here's the top five reasons John McCain lost the Presidential election:

1. John McCain was attached to the Republican Party, which is attached to the personification of Evil, Dick Chaney.
2. John McCain was attached to the Republican Party, which is attached to George Bush, whose Presidency is one of the worst of all time.
3. John McCain was attached to the Republican Party, which had control of Congress and the Presidency for almost two full terms and did nothing to improve the country.
4. John McCain's pivotal moment during the campaign--the time out he called to try to fix the economy--was a total and complete failure in which he appeared to hurt the situation more than he helped it.
5. Sarah Palin's addition as VP didn't add any new voters to the Republican Ticket.

What do you notice on that list? You notice Palin's name didn't occur until Number 5, and that was a DISTANT five. The Republican loss wasn't because of Sarah Palin, it was because of the almost complete failure of the Republican Party in the last five years. Nice try pinning it on the girl, but as Truman said, the buck stops here. YOU all had the opportunity to do great work for this country, and YOU didn't. That's the reason you lost. End of story.

Finally, to be fair, I will say this to critique Palin, both to show that I'm not just a blind Palin-lover, and because I think it's both true and something that needs to be said to her:

Sarah...you're through.

I'm sorry Sarah, but you're done. You're not running for President in 2012. You're not running for President in 2016. Your job was to excite the populace and inspire women and moderates to vote for you. Fairly or not, you did neither. It doesn't matter whether the criticism laid on you by your fellow fems was fair, it doesn't matter whether the media's portrayal of you was correct. What matters is a simple question: did people go out and vote for you? The answer was an obvious no, and given how hostile both of those groups were towards you, there's no reason to think that will change in four years. There's no reason to think that will change in even eight years. So quit talking about it, quit hinting at it, and quit trying to stay in the national spotlight. Enjoy your fifteen minutes, be proud of the landmark you did accomplish, and go back to being Governor of Alaska. Maybe you can be Alaska's Senator, but that's about as good as it's going to get for you. Like it or not, you're done. Sorry to be the one to break it to you.

So there you go. The Sarah Palin experience is now over. One thing, in the end, we can all agree on, no matter what our stance, beliefs, and prejudices were against her: she definitely made things more interesting.

Good night, and good luck.

The Next Cartoon Movies

I received a fantastic email this morning. My good friend and avid reader Ben sent me this site. I'm sure that the concept--what popular 80's cartoon would make a good modern movie--surprises no one in that it's right up my alley. So here's my list, in reverse order, not including He-Man as I do count the Dolph Lungren movie as a real movie:














5: Zoids & Visionaries: Knights Of The Magical Light
Had to go with a tie on this one. Both are enjoyable cartoons/toys from my youth, but both have flaws. First, I think that Zoids are too similiar to Transformers to get their own flick; their only hope would be a hack makes a cheap flick and hopes to draw some of the Transformer's crowd. Wait, I just gave Uwe Boll an idea. Forget I said that.

Visionaries, on the other hand, was a cool concept that just didn't catch on enough to warrant their own movie. I always liked the toys and concept, though, even if they were similar to He-Man. I'd be happy to see this movie made, but it probably won't happen.



4. Silverhawks
Silverhawks was a fantastic cartoon that was a sequal, of sorts, to Thundercats. It starred the same voice talent and many of the characters were similar. I loved this cartoon and the toys that went with it, and with the acceptance of SciFi in today's culture I think this would make a great flick. However, it probably wasn't quite mainstream popular enough to warrant it's own movie. A shame, though: I liked this cartoon better than Thundercats.


3. M.A.S.K.
M.A.S.K. is probably one of the most commonly brought up "I can't believe they haven't re-released these guys" toys from the 80's--Penny Arcade even references M.A.SK. in one of their comics. This would also be fairly easy to do with human actors. I think that they will re-release the toy line before they do a movie, but if they ever do roll out the toys once again, it probably won't be too long before a movie follows that.


2. Voltron
Honestly, the only reason I think that no one has made a Voltron movie is that they're worried that kids will realize that Power Rangers is a modern, pusified version of Voltron. Undeniably one of the greatest cartoons of all time, the Voltron toys have already been re-released in several different forms; I'm proud to own one of the authentic replicas (made of metal, not just plastic crap). The success of Transformers should mean that this should be a movie within the next three years.


1. Thundercats
If GI Joe meets with even moderate success, I don't see how Thundercats isn't made into a movie. Unquestionably one of the top five cartoons of the 80's, I wasn't all that surprised to see that there is a Thundercats cartoon movie--in the line of Cartoon Network's redo of He-Man--coming in 2010. If that has good success, which if it's halfway decent it undoubtly will, I can't see a live action movie not being made. Hell, if we could do Planet of the Apes, we can easily do Thundercats.

The 44th President, & The End Of Racism

We now have our 44th President--Barack Hussein Obama II. I'm happy not only because we had a fair and decisive election (though if I hear one more pundit refer to it as a "historic event"--yes, we know it's historic, come up with a new phrase--I might have to hurt them), but because Obama's election signifies a monumental achievement: a beginning to the end of racism.

I know what you're thinking. "Whoa. Hold on there. There are still plenty of racist people in America today! How can you even think that? You're an idiot."

The last part may indeed be true. However, you have to accept the rest. As I've spoken about racism before, a sad truth on predjudice of all types is that their complete erradication is almost assuredly impossible. There are always going to be misguided people who find an excuse--race, sex, religion, college affiliation, hair color, you name it--to hate other people. I don't think any of us ever really see this going away.

The goal, then, is the eradication of these behaviors being accepted in society. You want to be a racist asshole? That's fine, you as an individual can be that way. But the goal is that you'll be shunned by the rest of mainstream society, and that any overt actions you take to hurt the lives of others--physical violence, threatning behaviors, discrimination--will be put down and corrected swiftly by society around you. In other words, everyone has the right to be an asshole--but you don't have the right to hurt someone else's life in any way, shape, or form. Society won't let you.

The election of a minority as President is the final sign that American society has accepted this stance on racism. Literally, it doesn't get any better than this. The man running the most powerful country in the world has been chosen without regard to his race, and most of America is enthusiastically looking forward to his leadership.

There are still minor barriers that minorities can point to (in the sports world, more minority owners is a common example), but the truth is the biggest hurdle has been cleared, the highest mountain has been climbed. America is now truly and unarguably a place where any child born can make the most of their opportunities. Any child born in America can really and truly do ANYTHING, up to and including achieving the role of the most powerul human being in the world.

Regardless of your political feelings towards Obama, this, my friends, is a beautiful and wonderful thing, and deserves to be celebrated. We have finally entered the future we've dreamed of for so long, where we can move on and quit worrying about the mistakes made in the past, because we know that the PRESENT is a place where we are all equal, and where every American can truly be anything they want to be.

God bless America, the greatest nation in the world.

Two Slightly Unconventional Positions On Election Day

Make Election Day A National Holiday

This, to me, continues to be one of the stupidest and most frustrating things in America. How is Election Day not a National Holiday? Voting is (supposedly) one of our greatest rights and one of America's greatest claims to fame; we can't have it be a day off to make sure everyone has a chance to particpate? Wouldn't our Presidents gladly give up a holiday for themselves for eveyone to participate in and then celebrate the Right To Vote? Wouldn't MLK support that as well? And for God's sake, does anyone not in the banking business or post office even know when Columbus Day is? No one even likes Columbus anymore!

This is a travesty. Please, give everyone the oppoturnity to vote, and the chance to celebrate one of our greatest rights. Let's make Election Day a National Holiday

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Everyone Vote...If You've Done You're Homework

As my previous point above shows, I most certainly believe in the right of every American to vote, and of course who am I to argue with "Vote or Die, Mother Fuckers". That being said...I still want/expect Americans to act responsibly.

Do your homework people. I'm not asking you to be experts, but have at least a fair idea of where candidates stand on major issues. Thanks to the miracle of the internet, it's easy in this day and age to have a working knowledge of the candidates you are asked to vote on. No voting for Clinton because you think he's cute, Bush because he owned the Rangers, or Obama because he's black, and for God's sake please just don't vote based on party lines. Please, take a few minutes, become an informed voter, familiarize yourself with the two candidates, and cast an educated ballot.

The world will be a better place if you do.

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Happy Election Day! God Bless America!

The Answer to the Pistons

It's being reported that Chauncey Billups and Antonio McDyess are being sent to the Nuggets for Allen Iverson.

Apparently the Nuggets are going to buy out McDyess, and I'm guessing he would then immediately return to the Pistons. I like this trade a lot more if he stays; you're a fool if you think Nene and KMart are going the whole season without missing time for injury. Since they lost Camby for nothing this offseason, having McDyess as a backup would be a good move for the Nuggets.

Honestly, I have no idea what the Nuggets are trying to do since last season. Giving Camby away for nothing seemed to signify that the Nuggets were going to rebuild; it seemed only a matter of time before Iverson and his expiring contract was dealt. However, instead of using Iverson--still a great (though not elite) player--to offload one of your bad contracts (the aforementioned Nene and/or KMart), you've instead added a good (not great) point guard who has four years left at $11 mil per on his deal. Not only have you not used Iverson to improve your cap space, but you've hurt it, especially when you consider that Billups is most certainly on the downside of his career. This seems like a deal meant to win now, though the Nuggets really have no realistic chance to win now. As far as I've heard, no draft picks are going from the Pistons to the Nuggets, either, making this even more of a head scratcher. The Nuggets franchise is really floundering right now.

As for the Pistons, my thoughts are, "Sure...why not?" This team was going to get third in the conference and lose in the second round again. Why not roll the dice on a star like Iverson and take a shot? If it fails, they're actually in better of a position then they were at the start of the season: instead of being stuck with a fading Chauncey the next three years, they have both AI and Rasheed Wallace coming off their books, giving them tons of cap space. They have a good nucleus of young talent (Rodney Stuckey, Jason Maxiel, Amir Johnson) and a veteran with several good years left in Tayshaun Prince. If they spend their money wisely and continue (Darko not included) to draft well, then this team could rebound in a year or two--especially if they use that cap space in 2010 to grab one of the players they didn't draft in 2003.

So for the short term, I think the Pistons still get in third place and still lose in the second round of the playoffs, but at least they're interesting now, and they're set for the long term. Whereas the Nuggets aren't really any better in the short term, and are definitely screwed in the long term.

Advantage: Pistons.