Merry Christmas everyone!

And a Happy New Year, too!

Movies You Should Watch: Her Alibi

Welcome to my newest posting, Movies You Should Watch. I think it's pretty self explanatory what the premise is here.

Her Alibi is an awesome Romantic Comedy staring the great Tom Selleck and Paulina Porizkova, who is a supermodel/actress. Tom plays a hack detective writer who has serious writers block since his wife WAS INCINERATED WHEN THE MICROWAVE WENT BISERK DURING A THUNDERSTORM (or left him for a literary critic--how humiliating!)! While hanging out at the local courthouse looking for book ideas, he sees and falls in love with a beautiful Rumanian woman who is on trial for murder. Tom provides an alibi to get her off, and zaniness ensues.

As we all know, anytime a plot hits the ground with "zaniness ensues", you know you've got something good. There are a lot of good things about this movie on top of that. First, it stars Tom Selleck when he was at his peak as an actor, and I would have to say Tom Selleck is one of my favorite actors of all time. Laugh if you will, but that guy is greatness. He makes the coolest guy list (along with the likes of George Clooney and Sean Connery...I smell a top five list coming!). Second, Paulina is crazy cute in this movie, and I'm not normally into the model/waife look. She also does a good job with her part, which is impressive considering she's a model. Third, the story is fricking hilarious. It does a good job of balancing that fine line of romantic enough for the girls/funny enough to keep the guys interested.

So if you or your beautiful/handsome other are in the mood for a good Romantic Comedy, and want to see something I'm sure you've never seen before, go with Her Alibi. It's a really good flick. I've got a copy, and if you're my friend, I'll let you borrow it; if you're an acquaintance, I'll rent it to you; if you're a stranger, try Hastings/Blockbuster/Hollywood/Movie Trading Company, cause you're SOL with me, sorry. It's probably in my top ten favorite movies, it's that good.

This has been your first segment of Movies You Should Watch. I hope you enjoyed it. We'll be back whenever we feel like it. Merry Christmas one and all!

Thoughts on the NBA Season so far

What a fricking year. WHAT A GREAT SEASON!!!!!!! If the season is mediocre for the rest of the year, this will still be one of the best years since the mid 90s. Fantastic. Let's get going...

Pleasant surprises: Orlando Magic, Phoenix Suns, Seattle Supersonics, Dallas Mavericks

* Orlando Magic: Basically, everything that I said needed to go right for them has gone right. Grant Hill has been awesome, Dwight Howard is playing like a number one pick (at least in the high school day and age), and Stevie Franchise is reminding everyone why people used to call him Stevie Franchise. Let's face it: looking at how well Orlando is doing, and how poorly Houston is doing, can the media pundits just admit that they had Jeff Van Gundy overrated (ding!) as a coach? You coach to your talent, not to your system.

* Phoenix Suns: I knew the Suns would be this good, too, just not this early. They have been simply incredible. Steve Nash should probably be the league MVP, Amare is probably the second best power forward in the entire league, behind only KG, and Marion, Joe Johnson, and Q-Rich are all having career years. Yes, the Nash signing will hurt them salary cap wise years down the road, but it was EXACTLY what both Nash and the Suns needed. A great, well balanced team.

* Seattle Supersonics: I had them picked 14th. Holy God was I wrong. Now, I will say this: I agree with those critics who say the Sonics are not "for real". "For real" meaning that they aren't legit contenders for a championship. They're in the Mavericks category of "can beat anyone on any night, and scare any team in the league, but are a step below being a threat to win it all". I mean, they've been awesome, but let's face it: they are a jump shooting team. Some day those jumpers will stop falling. As Morpheus says, "It's not a matter of hope; for me, it's simply a matter of time." However, this team is still extremely well put together, with a legitimate superstar in Ray Allen, a guy who took the step to stardom (not superstardom--there is a difference) this season in the person of Rashard Lewis (why couldn't he have done this two years ago when I thought he would, and I had him on my fantasy league team?), and a great supporting cast who knows their roles and plays within their bonds. Not only are they good, but they are a fun team to watch. HOWEVER: remember basketball law number 1: if you live by the jumper, you die by the jumper. No team that lives by the jumper all season long will ever win an NBA championship. They're still a great team though.

* Dallas Mavericks: They got their own post, so I won't spend too much time here. Like the Suns (though they aren't as good as the Suns), I thought they would be this good, just not this soon. Kudos to Dirk again for having an MVP caliber season (won't it be funny if it comes down to him and Nash for MVP?). But like the Sonics: if you live by the jumper, you die by the jumper.

Let's not get too excited about these teams: Cleveland Cavaliers, Washington Wizards, Miami Heat, Denver Nuggets

* Cleveland Cavaliers: Lebron is amazing. Just unbelievably incredible. That being said...don't be too impressed with the Cavs being in second in the East. They still have Drew Gooden as their third best player. Yes, the East is that bad.

* Washington Wizards: Kudos for Larry Hughes finally starting to play up to his potential. Kudos to Jamison for being a leader and playing somewhat up to his potential. Kudos to Gilbert Arenas for continuing to play to his potential. That being said...it's the fricking East. Yes, the East is that bad.

* Miami Heat: Replace Lebron with Dwayne Wade, and replace Udonis Heslam with Drew Gooden, and read the Cavs description again. I mean, someone has to be in first place, right? Yes, the East is that bad (get the point?).

* Denver Nuggets: This is don't get too excited in the bad sense. No team looked worse than the Nuggets the first two weeks of the season. Even when they won, they looked bad. But they are starting to get it together a little. They're kind of the opposite of the Suns: I thought both teams would start slow, and get better. The Suns started much better than I thought. The Nuggets started a lot worse. Both will get better (which is scary in the case of the Suns).

What the Hell happened to these guys? Utah Jazz, Houston Rockets, Memphis Grizzlies, New Orleans Hornets

* Utah Jazz: They started out the season great...and man I don't know what in the Hell has happened to them. They look terrible. Now missing Kirlenko is a big blow, but the whole point of this team is supposed to be that they aren't dependent on one man. They're much better than they've played; it's weired. It's like they started the season knowing how to play together, and two weeks into the season forgot how to do it.

* Houston Rockets: Wow. I predicted people had them way overrated (ding!), and I STILL had them overrated (ding!). The big problem here: Yao Ming. Go into the October archive and read what I wrote about him in my Western Conference Preview, and thank you Yao for proving me correct. He's totally lost most of the time, and just happy to be here. And I think I would be the third most athletic guy on the Rockets; I think my baby brother Sam would be the third most athletic guy on the Rockets. (That's not good.)

* New Orleans Hornets: We knew they would be bad. But worse in the history of the NBA bad? Wow. That's bad when you cannot wait until Jamaal Magloire gets back.

Now for Coupla Things on the rest of the league...

* Let me check: yes, Marquis Daniels still scares me.

* Is it just me, or have the Celtics lost every single game either in overtime or by two points? I think they're a 20 point swing away from being undefeated.

* I've had several OSU fans get all excited after the NBA Tonight crew on ESPN went nuts on Tony Allen after he got a tip in dunk and scored 12 points the other night. Just a reminder: Harold Minor had some great dunks, and scored 12 points once or twice. I'm not saying he's not going to be a decent pro; I'm just saying let's not get too excited here.

* Kobe. Wow. Is there a more disgusting human being on the face of the Earth? Probably...but without question Kobe cracks the top 5. I won't waste any more time talking about him.

* Karl Malone: he's probably the NBA player I've hated most my entire life. I hate dirty, bitchy players, which is what he's always been. And now, after hitting on his friends wife, I have a personal reason to hate him, too! Yay! Am I a bad person for being happy about this? Naw...

* Mike D'Antoni is without question the Coach of the Year, right? And none of you have any idea who he is, right?

* Good for Jamal Crawford for playing so well (he's without question the Clutch Player of the Year), but I'm pissed that he's helping the Knicks win. Go to Hell, Isaiah!

* Watch out for the Pacers man. They're still playing well, even while missing all their good players...they're getting them back a little at a time, so they have time to work each person back in...they definitely have the "us against the world" mentality, and when a team REALLY has it (not faking like they have it, like the Sacramento Queens tried to do for years) that's a great thing...they get the craziest player in the league back for the START OF THE PLAYOFFS, just in time to scare the shit out of EVERYBODY. This is going to be fun...

* I've changed my mind: I love Shaq. I didn't like him when he first came into the league, and all he did was talk shit about how great he was, and bitch about officiating even though all he did was knock people down and dunk on them. Now, he's the last athlete left in the league who is totally honest in every interview, he's funny, and he's such a true Superman fan that he made the worst movie in the world--Steel--even when he knew it was the worst film ever (he did know that, right?). He still talks shit about how good he is, but not near as much, and after getting as many rings and MVP awards as he has, he's earned it. I'm sorry, but I have to admit I like the guy now.

* Lebron James is fricking unbelievable. Scary unbelievable. Fine I'll say it: I think he might be better than Jordan. No, I don't mean he will be better than Jordan. I mean I think he might be better than Jordan, right now. I can't believe I just wrote that.


And remember...the NBA...it's FANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNTASTIC!

Review: Ocean's 12

As those of you who pay attention to my T5 lists might remember, Ocean's 11 is my second favorite movie of all time. So, when I heard that Ocean's 12--the much anticipated sequel--was coming out, to say that I was excited would be an understatement. I couldn't wait for this movie to get there. Well, last night I went to the theatre and paid full price to see it, as the theatre by me no longer does student ticket pricing (son of a...).

I'd give the movie a C-. I was pretty disappointed. Now, I had lowered my expectations for this movie. There was NO WAY it could be as good as the first one, and so I made sure I didn't expect it to be. I also had heard from some friends who saw it over the weekend, and said that they were disappointed in it, so I lowered my expectations a little more so that hopefully I would not be disappointed.

I won't tell you any of the plot--it's still worth seeing, especially on video. It was just...zany. Ocean's 11 was great because it was funny, clever, and SMOOTH. This movie tries a little too hard to be funny, and it tries WAY to hard to be clever. The problem with sequels of clever movies is they try to outclever the first one, and instead end up just whirling you around, leaving out details, making total unrealistic and unimpressive plot jumps and/or conclusions, and leave you just wanting them to end the nonsense and quit being so smug. Oceans 11 was smooth; 12 was jerky. Also, the seamless meshing of the characters--so hard with such an all star cast--that made the first movie so impressive was not there. It was subtle, but I could hear the director saying to each character, "Okay now it's your turn to be on!" instead of just going out and telling the story and working everyone in. Finally, a well known star made a cameo in the movie that was disastrous (and I love this star). I could just see him telling one of his buddies, "Hey man, you need to get me in this one!", and then they preceded to dream up some half-cocked scheme to get him in in the middle of production.

It wasn't all bad. There were still some pretty funny moments; I mean, with this cast, you're going to have great acting and some good comedy from them. I thought Matt Damon was hilarious a couple of times. Catherine Zeta Jones was INCREDIBLY beautiful in this movie. Oh my God. She SKYROCKETED up the list after this movie. She has always been similar to Cameron Diaz to me: both were incredibly beautiful in their first hit movies (The Mask for Diaz, The Mask of Zorro for Jones), and then for whatever reason (eating disorder for Diaz, just looking weird in her movies for Jones) really dropped on the appearance scale. She gets her hair cut short in this movie (excellent idea), however, and doesn't overdue it with her makeup, and just looks fantastic. Seeing her in this alone is worth renting the movie.

Oh, and a small spoiler here, but a side note I feel is worth mentioning: if I ever do anything that causes someone to seek revenge against me, and you decide you're going to confront me at my wedding, you had better fucking kill me, because I'll kill a motherfucker who walks into my wedding and embarrasses me in front of my bride/family/whoever. Without question.

So anyway, a little disapointed in Ocean's 12. It's no Blade II (the worst sequel ever, probably), but it definitely doesn't crack the best sequel's list, which I'll probably do next week. Of course, tell me what you think about the movie in the comments.

Take care everybody! Merry Christmas.

Stephen King

We all know who this man is: perhaps the most prolific American author of the 20th century. This is a man who has captivated the world with his imagination, and his done it by appealing to two different audiences: readers and moviegoers. His stories have haunted us to our core, provided us with pictures of purest joy, taught us the pain of deepest sadness, and made us question who we are and what exactly we are doing in this world. And he's done it with style.

Stephen King has penned some of my favorite novels (The Stand, Salem's Lot) and movies (It, Needful Things, Shawshank Redemption). He's also written some books that I just could not finish (Tommyknockers, Dreamcatcher) and movies that were just stinkers (The Night Flier). I've read a substantial amount of Stephen King's works--though a substantial amount still remains to be read--and still don't know precisely what to make of him.

I'll never forget reading Salem's Lot and The Stand. I literally could not put those books down. I read the complete and unabridged version of The Stand, which is about 1500 pages long, if I remember correctly. I still managed to read it in about a week. His worlds are at the same time breathtakingly creative because of the strange things that happen there, and yet frighteningly realistic. Sure, we don't believe in demons anymore, and we don't really believe in aliens coming to take us over, or ghosts, or vampires; most people don't even believe in The Devil anymore. And yet Stephen King always finds a way to make us wonder: what if? What if there are one or two Type One Vampires out there, waiting to be invited in? Our ancestors believed in vampires for centuries. What if The Devil is out there, waiting for us to end our "modern civilization" with a superflu? It would be just like the Dark Ages. It's his belief in humanity that I believe is what draws his readers to him. He doesn't dismiss outright our legends, myths, and folk tales. He simply says, "What if they are true? And what would happen if these forces were at work today? What if there is more to our world than our modern "science" tells us?" It's our belief--or hope--that there is more than meets the eye that keeps us drawn to Stephen King.

Just as strong of a draw, however, is King's belief in the ongoing battle between Good and Evil. It's more than just a possessed car, or an evil clown, or the execution of a murderer. It's the ultimate battle. It's the Walkin Dude. It's the Crimson King. And they're after all of us; they're after everything. Stephen King believes that there is a point to our lives that is greater than ourselves; he believes that we are part of a struggle that has been fought since the dawn of time. He believes that our actions matter; he believes that our choices matter, and that is a powerful belief for all of us. We all want to believe that we aren't just passing the time here, and that our short time in this existence is nothing more than a short time existence. We want to believe that we--that all life--is meant for something more, is part of something more, or part of something greater and more noble. We want to know that the choices we make, that how we decide to live, means something on a greater scale. King appeals to that something more in his stories; our choices and battles do make a difference--one way or another--in that fight between darkness and light. We are in charge of our destiny, and that is something we want to be in control of.

Not that King is perfect. Sometimes he waxes too poetic. In Tommyknockers, for instance, I read half of the book--almost 400 pages--and could not BELIEVE I was only halfway done. Like many great writers, they can fall in love with their words, and draw it out too long. As fantastic as The Stand was, there were several times that I would finish a 150 page chapter/block/whatever and think, "My God that was incredibly well written, but was not really necessary to the story at all." Stephen King provided me with an appreciation of Editors for the first time in my life. There are also those who complain that Stephen King is too far out there, and too unbelievable. This is a legitimate complaint; even I have thought that a couple of times. He stretches the limits of our imagination, and sometimes one can stretch too far. Anyone who writes as many stories as Stephen King is going to have some that people just can't get into.

That being said, I still think Stephen King is one of the greatest authors of all time. No matter what style of books you are a fan of, you can find a story to fit your desires among King's impressive array of titles. The man has given us some fantastic stories in his lifetime, and the world will surely miss him when he's gone.

Oklahoma State Basketball

After last night's convincing win over #4 Syracuse, I realized I still haven't written a post about OSU basketball. What the Hell is wrong with me? Well, easy way to fix that...

I think this team is even better than last year's team, and last year's team was the best OSU team I'd ever seen (yes, even better than Desmond's Final Four team). Let's take a look at the lineup:

* Point Guard: John Lucas, Daniel Bobik. I'm sorry, but I'm still pissed that Tony Allen got Player of the Year last year. Make no mistake: John Lucas was the best player in the Big 12 last year. He was the difference maker; he turned this team from a good group of players into a championship team. And Bobik? A 4.6 to 1 assist to turnover ratio, while being a 34% 3point shooter? Yeah, I'll take that as my "backup".

* Shooting Guard: Stephen Graham, JamesOn Curry, Daniel Bobik. This is the "who's hot"? Position. Last night it was Stephen. I feel like he's out of position at guard--he's a small forward--but if he has any hopes of playing at the next level, it will be here. Very solid.

* Small Forward: Joey Graham, Stephen Graham. Joey's a potential player of the year, though I'm a little disappointed in him thusfar. He hasn't taken his game to the next level, that "Wow he's a top ten pick no question!" level. I've been more impressed with Stephen, who has stepped his game up another level, though he's still not on par with Joey.

* Power Forward: Ivan McFarlin, Terrence Crawford. God I love IMac. He weighs less than I do. Unbelievable. I think he might be the worst looking good basketball player I've ever seen. He looks so goofy out there, but he's great. Crawford...I can't stand this guy, I think he's horrible. It's not all his fault; his knee problems have made it so he moves like Patrick Ewing did when he was with the Sonics. However, he is good as the "go in and hit somebody" thug type, and for some reason the crowd loves him, so when he does ANYTHING right, it's a huge emotional boost to the team.

* Center: Ivan McFarlin, Frans Steyn. FRANZ!!!! I have yet to see him play yet this year, but Sam says he's doing really well. All I know is, the guy is 7'2" 289. He can contribute something. Nothing cracks me up more than watching McFarlin play center, but hey, again, somehow it works. Warick only had 13 points last night.

This is a really deep team of Seniors who know each other very well, and play Eddie's system very well. They didn't lose anyone of consequence after last season (Tony Allen was Even Stephen! He hurt you as much as he helped you!), and the players who have needed to step up this year (Stephen Graham, Bobik) have done so.

I think Joey MUST bring his game to that Player of the Year level in order for OSU to win it all. Even if that doesn't happen, however, this is a top five team in the country all season--no question. Syracuse is a great team, playing in close to their home court, on Prime Time TV, and OSU still did exactly what it needed to do to beat them, and beat them fairly soundly. That was a high quality win for OSU. This is a talented team that is entertaining to watch.

Go Pokes!

Coupla things

* That's not a typo. I consider "coupla" a word, since most people don't say "A couple of", they slur it into one word, "coupla".

* Saw that the guy that threw the beer and started the fight, and the guy that threw the chair at the players/crowd were banned from the Palace of Auburn Hils. I'm sure that punishment will have remarkable impacts on the rest of their lives, especially the guy who threw the chair, who has been arraigned on attempted murder charges, and convicted of beating his baby's momma (the guy who threw the beer has previous assault convictions, as well). Real gems of humanity there. But remember: it was all the player's fault. They should have to stand there and take it from these guys.

* If the story ever breaks that Simply Orange orange juice has Crack in it, I'm just going to nod my head and say, "Yep".

* For those of you who doubt that man has an inane drive to conquer and destroy, I have 2 words for you: bubble wrap.

* I think the DePaul Blue Demons have the coolest logo in college basketball. Without even looking at it, I think the Hawaii Rainbows have the worst.

* I think Paris Hilton is the ugliest "hot" girl ever. Uh.

* There is no higher high and no lower low than being in first or last place in your fantasy basketball league.

* That Maroon 5 song She will be loved is my favorite song out there right now. Thanks Bob for making me listen to it.

* G Dub (The President) seems to have the most diverse cabinet ever. Why don't I hear Democrats complimenting him on this?

* No, the Repulicans wouldn't do it either. It's still just worth pointing out.

* I think Lindsey is the most charismatic person I've ever met.

* Nothing beats going home, turning on the Christmas tree lights, lying down on the couch, and just watching them twinkle.

* I'm a little disappointed in Halo 2. First of all, I feel like all I do is reload my guns; I never really get to fire them. Second of all, grenades don't do shit for damage anymore, so you HAVE to have two weapons. Third of all, the maps seem...I don't know...too busy for me. Maybe I'll get used to them, but it seems like they are just too cluttered. Of course, I was never crazy about that game in the first place, so perhaps I'm not the best person to ask.

* I don't think Stacey's Mom has it going on, myself.

* Did you see that the son of the Secretary General of the UN was taking bribes (I'm sorry, payments) from Iraq for like the last five years? And did you like the "non-legally binding" agreement Iran entered into with the UN? I know this is a song we've all sung many times, but why exactly do we have the UN? What do they contribute to the world, other than useless talk?

* Check out The Ray's Christmas List (link on the right). It's pretty good. Everyone should write a Christmas list; trust me people, it's fun.

* God bless you one and all, and too all...a good night.