Californ-I-A

It's time to discuss a subject I really didn't ever think I'd touch here: Miss America.

The scoop: Miss California came in second in the Miss America contest literally because of one question: she was asked by Perez Hilton what her stance on gay marriage was. While being as polite and dignified as possible, she answered that her family and religious beliefs led her to the belief that marriage was between a man and a woman. She apologized if she offended anyone, but said she felt it important to answer honestly and say what she believed in.

It was the best possible answer one could give on such a controversial issue. She gave her honest opinion--something so rarely seen at these events--but did not come off as condescending or hateful towards gays.

Hilton looked angry immediately at the answer, and not only bragged afterward at ruining her score--which, as the Runner Up, proved that that question did, indeed, cost her the crown--but also called her a "bitch" and said that if she has won he would have run onstage and pulled the crown off her head.

There is an outstanding report on msnbc.com, where Matt Lauer interviews both Hilton and Miss California. Go check it out; my favorite part is the, "Oh shit, I am totally FUCKED" expression on Cali's face as the question was being asked. Remember that as it will be important later.

I don't want this post to be about whether or not gay marriage should be allowed; that topic has already been addressed here. My questions are thus: should she have answered honestly or given a token answer, and should she have been penalized for giving said honest answer?

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To me, this debate symbolizes everything that is wrong with modern America. First, let's look at the pagaent itself.

The Miss America pagaent is truly dead as something that young women should aspire to if worthless fucks such as this goofball Perez Hilton are judging. First, why is this asshole a judge? What are his qualifications? What has he done that has earned him a spot on a national stage? Apparently he's another creepy, flamboyant, rude blogger to the stars who has done ABSO-FUCKING-LUTELY NOTHING TO HELP BENEFIT SOCIETY. Nothing. I'm a blogger, too, and I enjoy doing it, but you are not helping society and the human race advance by doing so. It is what it is. Yet this guy is somehow qualified to judge who is the best of young women in America? Are you fucking kidding me?

If his background was not proof enough that he shouldn't have been there in the first place, then his actions after the contest surely are proof that he doesn't belong. Referring to one of the top 50 young women in the country as a bitch? Really? That's how you want a judge to act? Bragging that he would have made an embarrassing and illegal (grabbing the crown off her head would be Battery) scene had the result not been what HE had decided should be? Oh so that's how the contest works! A panel of judges gets to decide, but if their decision isn't what Perez Hilton wants, then he gets to attack Miss America! That's a great contest! Finally, his nonsensical ramblings in the Lauer interview (basically a spoiled child screaming over and over again, "I didn't get what I wanted, so screw her!") show that he doesn't have the basic intelligence to judge anyone. He didn't explain his position with grace and dignity. He rambled, contradicted himself, and looked like the worthless asshole he is. Truly a fantastic choice as a judge.

So we've placed an idiotic, worthless blowhard in a position of authority because he caught a niche of celebrity. Awesome, and sadly too true of modern America. What's next?

Next, of course, is freedom of speech and the consequences therein, or should she have been penalized for her answer? No, I don't think she should have been penalized, regardless of which way she answered the question. To me what should have been judged is how she answered the question: did she answer with grace and aplomb; did she state her opinion clearly; was she fair in her assessment of the situation; did she intentionally try to demean/antagonize those who believe the opposite of what she believes? She obviously did a great job on all of those criteria. What was most refreshing, to me, too, was that she actually answered the question, even though she knew it would hurt her chances. Again, look at the expression on her face as she is being asked the question. She isn't caught off guard at all. She was praying that this question didn't come to her, because she knew that her honest answer would unquestionably hurt her. IN SPITE OF THAT, she answered the question with her beliefs instead of the PC answer that she knew is the norm.

Too often in America today in all walks of life--politics, entertainment, sports, the news, even in our day to day lives--our era of over-political correctness rules the day. People are afraid to say ANYTHING because it might be perceived as unpopular by some/anyone. It is my firm belief that it is a huge problem in America today. What America needs most of in the future is people who are willing to stand up and state their points/beliefs, and do so in a way that isn't meant to attack/insult/demonize those who believe the opposite (as happens so often in politics today). It's just an honest assessment of their opinion; it's simply an honest answer of a question asked to them. THAT is what America needs more of, not the nonsensical, unintelligable dribble that so often is spewed forth at pagaents such as these...and in political debates...and in interviews...and in answers to questions asked of coworkers or others we meet on a day to day basis. Stop CYAing, and just answer the damn question. And sadly, in today's world, that's not what is acceptable, which is why Miss Califonia is the runner up.

That being said, to all of those who point out that she should have gone with the neutral or PC answer, I have a response for you: Thank you for helping to make America weak. Thank you for helping to ruin the future of discourse not just here, but in the world. Thank you for continuing the assault on honest, frank conversation, and instead encouraging the era of cowardice that we live in now where everyone is scared to point out that the Emperor is--in point of fact--standing there butt-ass naked. Yes, we all know that the safe answer would be to be PC. Thanks for that brilliantanalysis. The safe answer, though, isn't always the best answer, and if all you care about is winning some silly contest that no one really cares about anyway, then continue to destroy the world around you and play it safe. The best answer, though, is the one that helps make the world a better place by encouraging people to be honest without being insulting, and that shows people that it is okay to have an opinion and state it simply. That's the best answer. And that's what people get remembered for, and that will allow Miss California to look at herself in the mirror at night. Can you?

2009 NBA PLAYOFFS PREVIEW

What an exciting playoffs we're in for! Lots of drama in the first coupla rounds, little drama in the latter rounds, and a what-could-be-finer matchup in the Finals between...well, I'm getting ahead of myself.

We'll knock out the West quickly, since I've already addressed it when I WAS EXACTLY RIGHT IN PREDICTING HOW THE SEASON WOULD END AND WHAT THE PLAYOFF MATCHUPS WOULD BE on Tuesday. Not to brag, though. :-)

WESTERN CONFERENCE, ROUND 1

Lakers (1) over Jazz (8) in 5
The Jazz manage to win one at home, as Utah is disappointed in the offseason when Carlos Boozer decides to stay.

Nuggets (2) over Hornets (7) in 7
This is a really interesting series, as I think it is the best possible matchup for the Hornets, and one of the worst for the Nuggets. The Nuggets are definitely the better team this year. That being said, NO has the best player in the series, and both the Nuggets abysmal past playoff performances and tendency to go crazy as a team work against it. Honestly, I could easily see NO winning this series. I'm going with Denver for a coupla reasons: 1) Chauncey usually waits til later in the playoffs to shoot his team out of it, 2) Denver does have the home court, which does mean something especially when you play there four times in two weeks, and 3) the just isn't New Orleans' year. It's the Yang to last year's Yin. It will be interesting though.

Mavs (6) over Spurs (3) in 6
There are so many reasons to go with the Mavs in this series that my only real concern is that this is the "it's so obvious of an upset that everyone picks it and it doesn't go through." The Mavs have built their team around beating the Spurs. The Mavs are peaking as the season ends, whereas the Spurs are dropping like a stone. The Mavs have gotten slightly healthier as the wisely rested Josh Howard before the last two weeks of the regular season, whereas Manu is out for the season and Timmy can't walk without limping. This is one of the few series where you can actually say that the Mavs have a younger and more athletic bench. The Mavs win the battle of Fading Teams from the 90's.

Blazers (4) over Rockets (5) in 6
Poor Houston. I really could say more, but that just about covers it. If they don't take this as a sign that--if for no other reason than karma--they must get rid of TMac this summer, then they will never get it.

WESTERN CONFERENCE, ROUND 2

Lakers (1) over Blazers (4) in 6
The Lakers win a wildly entertaining series that is never really in doubt, but shows Portland's enormous potential. Portland gets blown out in one game, but manages to keep the rest of the series close and wins one in LA. Portland leaves feeling good about themselves.

Nuggets (2) over Mavs (6) in 7
Can you tell I'm not a fan of this Nuggets team? Normally I would be chomping at the bit to predict the Nuggets folding under the pressure in Round 2. The problem, though, is that the Nugz match up best against the Mavs this season. Sometimes a team just has another team's number, and the Nuggets have that with the Mavs this year. It would take a colossal mental collapse for the Nuggets to lose this--and don't get me wrong, that is not out of the question--but I don't think it happens. The Mavs leave feeling good about themselves, and hopefully can use this surprisingly good playoff run to find someone dumb enough to take Josh Howard.

WESTERN CONFERENCE FINALS

Lakers (1) over Nuggets (2) in 6
I've got to be honest here: the only reason I'm going 6 games is I don't think the NBA will allow any less than 6 games to be played. The Lakers will MURDER the Nuggets, or whoever else ends up here.

EASTERN CONFERENCE, ROUND 1

Cavs (1) over Pistons (8) in 5
I love all the "don't sleep on the Pistons!" talk by the media, too. You've got to be kidding me. What has this team done but disappoint since they won their one title? How has this year been any different? And you think they're going to surprise Lebron? Riiiiight.

Celtics (2) over Bulls (7) in 7
This is a really good Bulls team that was much better in the second half after they made an outstanding trade with the Kings. With the news that KG will be out for the playoffs, I can honestly easily see this Bulls team beating the Celts. I think this goes one of two ways: The Bulls win in 5, or the Celtics win in 7, and there's no middle ground. I think the Celtics man up, play with pride, and manage to pull this out.

Magic (3) over Sixers (6) in 6
I do like the Sixers--think of them as D'Antoni's Suns Lite--but not enough to pick them over a good, but not great, Magic team.

Heat (5) over Hawks (4) in 6
Similar to Mavs-Spurs, this is another one where I'm nervous about "everyone will pick this upset so it won't happen" potential. This one is even more risky with that, because the Hawks are a better team than Miami. That being said, Dwayne Wade is an amazing playoff performer and by far the best player in the series, and if you don't think he's going to be getting almost as many calls as he got against the Mavs in The Finals so the NBA can get a Wade/Lebron matchup in Round 2, well, then you just don't understand the mind of Mr. David Stern.

EASTERN CONFERENCE, ROUND 2

Cavs (1) over Heat (5) in 6
Could easily happen in 5, but Lebron likes DWade too much to embarrass him like that. As good as Wade is, he's no Lebron, and the Cavs are a MUCH better team.

Magic (3) over Celtics (2) in 6
The Magic have absolutely and totally lucked out here. I couldn't WAIT to pick against them in the second round; to be honest, I would have probably picked Chicago over them in the first round if they had played each other. Luckily for them, they got the team least suited to win a playoff series in the first round. Then they get a Celtics team that is not only without their best player, but exhausted after a tough first round series. And you know what? I'm STILL thinking of taking the Celtics. I think if it goes 7, the C's win it, but I think they just have too little left in the tank to pull it out.

EASTERN CONFERENCE FINALS

Cavs (1) over Magic (2) in 6
Similar to the Western Conference Finals, the only reason I'm not going 5 is because I think the NBA won't let that happen. And don't be surprised if Lebron decides "F it" and wins it in 5 playing 5 on 8.

NBA FINALS

Cavs (1) over Lakers (1) in 6
Look people. I told you before. This is the Year of Lebron--the first of many. The Lakers have slightly more talent, but the Cavs have all of the intangibles--team that genuinely likes each other, team that is playing better now, adoring city 100% behind them--and, as good as Kobe is, the Cavs have the best player in the series. Lebron wins this one for his hometown, to end their suffering...so he can leave them happy after next year.

There is no stopping the King when he's got a plan.

Enjoy what is going to be a FANTASTIC playoffs as the Next Generation fully takes over.

The NBA...it's FANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNTASTIC!!!!!!!!

Your Guide To The Last Two (2) Days of the NBA Season

Good God. Has it really been over a month since I've written about the NBA? WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME? We need to fix this, and quickly.

* First, I'll do the awards real quickly for you, because they're fairly easy this year. 6th Man is unquestionably Jason Terry. He was born to play that role, and it's too bad that the Mavs don't have anyone better than Antoine Wright to start ahead of him. Most Improved is Kevin Durant. Right when he was getting to the point where people were starting to think, "Hey, shouldn't he be better? I mean, he was one of the most anticipated rookies ever...shouldn't he be better than he is?" he jumped two levels and started killing everyone. The good people of OKC wouldn't trade their team for anyone who doesn't have a player named "Lebron" on it right now. Coach of the Year...you know what, who really cares? I don't go to watch coaching. Give it to Stan Van Gundy because at least he's funny. ROY is Derrick Rose.

As for MVP, for some reason there's a lot of debate about this, which is just idiotic. Lebron James is the MVP. Period. End of story. He's the MVP however you look at it: he led his team to the best record (best player on best team logic), his team would be lottery-bound awful without him (player who is most valuable to his team), and he's the best overall player in the entire league. Look, Dwight Howard and Dwayne Wade had great seasons. Kobe played well. Good for all of them. But this isn't even close.

* The most disappointing team in the NBA this season? I'm going to do one from each conference: In the West, it's the New Orleans Hornets. Were the Suns a mess? Absolutely, but we knew they were fading. The Hornets were arguably the third best team in the league last season, and were only supposed to get better. Instead, if my predictions for the last two days of the season (see later) come true, then the Hornets will finish in seventh, and will most likely lose in the first round of the playoffs to a very mediocre Nuggets team. They didn't take one step forward, they took two steps back.

In the East, it is unquestionably the Toronto Raptors. Basketball just might be done in Toronto. This team should have been better than it was, and is an absolute LOCK to lose it's only star player after next season. If the economy in the NBA stays bad, the Raptors are in trouble for sure.

* Conversely, the most surprising team in the West was unquestionably the Denver Nuggets. Yes, the AI-Chauncey trade was totally unpredictable before the season, but even after that happened, did ANYONE think that, "Oh yeah, the Nuggets will finish in second place!" would be the outcome of that trade? Anyone?

In the East, I have to go with New York, for two reasons: 1) The Knicks were surprisingly good this year, and yes, I realize I'm saying this about a team that finished second to last in the conference. 2) The Knicks were so surprisingly good that their coach and GM intentionally sabotaged the team to make it worse this year. "Why would they do that?", you ask. Glad you asked--for two reasons: A) Because the Knicks were doing well enough that they knew they were about to enter the perennially mediocre period--they had players who were overperforming, leading them to make the last spot of the playoffs, were they would get spanked, get a crappy draft pick, and be stuck in the muck again. They don't want that. They WANT to be in the lottery this year and next year. B) Because adding more lottery picks adds talent that will help convince Lebron and Chris Bosh, or Lebron and Steve Nash, or Lebron and Amare, or Lebron and Amare to join the team in 2010. They want to be bad...but not horrible. Kudos for Mike and Donnie for being smart enough to avoid the perennial stinky middle.

* If you don't enjoy watching the Portland Trailblazers play, then the problem is with YOU, my friend. And if you don't think that with the right matchups they won't end up in the Western Conference Finals, then you are mistaken.

* Okay, here's some more awards for you: The Saddest Player of the Year Award goes to Greg Oden, who is a good kid and works hard but who is never, ever going to scratch the surface of what people (not me) thought he would be. This award will be named after him in two years. The "They're Dead, Finally!" Award goes to the San Antonio Spurs. I enjoy laughing every time I read one of those "Don't sleep on the Spurs, as long as they are playing they are in it!" columns from the media. Really? Two of their big three can't walk, and their fourth best player is arguably Roger Mason. The Most Underplayed Player Award goes to Anthony Randolph, the talented rookie on the Warriors who is an amazing athlete who might or might not be able to play basketball, but since he never plays enough under The Drunk Idiot (Don Nelson) we'll never know. The Most Likely To Have Received Joe Smith Money Without Being Caught Award goes to Cutino Mobley, who was traded from the Clippers to the Knicks, suddenly discovered he had a heart problem even though he'd been fine to play, oh, the day before, and then immediately decided to retire and clear up money from the Knicks cap rather than keep playing and collecting the rest of his contract. I'm just sayin. The Most Hilarious Moment of the Season Award goes to Andrew Bynum, for getting photographed carrying Hoez on his back at the Playboy Mansion after missing months with a knee injury, and then less than a week later the Lakers deciding, "You know what? Suit up. You're fucking playing." You have to love the NBA.

And, finally, the coveted Antoine Walker Most Overrated Player of the Year Award winner has to go to Tracy McGrady. Now don't get me wrong, I'm not a TMac hater as much as some are. When your team is never favored to win a first round matchup, I have a hard time trashing you completely as a player just because you never manage to slay Goliath. That being said, though, when your team is predicted to be a better team in the West, you suck for the first quarter of the season, you decide to quit for the season, almost everyone writes your team off, and then your team goes out and proceeds to FINALLY be favored in a first round matchup with home court advantage--probably finishing one game out of second place in the conference--then you, sir, have to win the Most Overrated Player Award. Sorry TMac. That's just a no brainer.

* Okay, so here's how I'm predicting the season finishes these last two days in the exciting Western Conference where 2 through 8 are up for grabs.

8: The reeling Jazz lose to the Lakers and are stuck with 8th, since Phil plays his whole team for a half in order to incorporate Bynum back in. Two quick thoughts on the Jazz: 1) Please feel free to make fun of John Hollinger--the stat guy on espn.com--for picking the Jazz as the best team in the NBA. Don't get me wrong, I love stats as much as the next guy, but there is nothing funnier than watching a overly arrogant guy who believe that statics only loses. It's so predictable, and so rewarding. I'll even tell you what his defense is going to be: he's going to complain about injuries derailing the team. Uh, John? When you have Carlos Boozer, Andrei Kirlenko, and Matt Harpring on your team, and your best player starts the season with an ankle injury, you can't use injuries as a defense. You must EXPECT the injuries John. Have fun. 2) Look, I know it's against Federal law to critique Jerry Sloan...but this team has one of the best starting fives in the league, and has several good backups (Harpring, Korver, Knight, and the only guy who could even be mentioned in Most Improved Player next to KD, Paul Milsap). Yes, we've established that injuries hurt them this season. But at some point don't you have to look at this team and say, "Hey, why aren't we ever taking that last step to Elite team?" And at some point doesn't that answer have to be the coach? Just wondering.
7: The Hornets lose another tough game, this one to the Rockets. They play Denver in the first round, in a 7 game could go either way series.
6: The Mavs beat the Rockets at home to clinch the eighth spot, wildly exceeding expectations, and setting themselves up perfectly for the first round.
5: The Rockets once again fail to gain home court advantage in the first round, proving that--even while there--the curse of TMac lives on.
4: A hot Portland team beats the Nuggets in a game that gives them home court advantage against the Rockets.
3: San Antonio is in third place and plays the Mavs in the first round--in spite of home court, the Spurs will lose if they play they Mavs. You heard it here first.
2: Denver hangs onto the two seed in spite of a loss to Portland.

This would be and incredibly awesome set of circumstances if it weren't for the fact that that Portland has to play the Lakers in Round 2, which is the real Western Conference Finals. The Lakers win easy, it's damn near a pic 'em between the Nugz and the Hornets--I'll go with Chauncey's vetern leadership having the Nugz pull it out, but I would not be surprised at ALL if CP3 wills the Hornets to a win--the Mavs beat the team they are most designed to beat in the Spurs in the battle of fading 90's powers, and Portland fairly easily beats the Rockets as they continue to be frustrated in getting out of the first round. In the second round, the Mavs put up a decent fight but lose to either Denver (who the Mavs don't match up with this year) or the Hornets (as Chris Paul averages a quadruple double, and no, I'm not kidding). The Lakers and Portland play a wildly entertaining series that really isn't ever in doubt, but shows the potential that Portland has for the future in the two games they win--one at LA. In the WC Finals, the Lakers kick the shit out of whoever is left, and I mean whoever--Spurs (who if they somehow manage to survive this far, can no longer even walk), Rockets (as Ron Ron goes nuts during game 3 or 4 as Kobe lights him up for his fourth 40 point game while talking shit the entire time. Hell also freezes over as this is the only time I root for Kobe), Mavs (the Mavs will not win one game against the Lakers as long as Kobe is there as they are presently constructed), Hornets (CP3 dazzles but the series is never really close, as the Lakers big men just beat David West into submission), or Nuggets (as Melo and Chauncey [the most overrated playoff performer ever] finally bows to the playoff pressure and play like crap, while the rest of the Nuggets just have a "We're happy to be here!" mentality). This is how I see the West finishing out, and yes, it is most certainly a Mavs' fan's best case scenario and wishful thinking. It does have a pretty good chance of happening though.

* I'm still going to write and NBA Playoff Preview once the final seedings are done, so I'm not going to to an Eastern Conference Preview here. However, let me spoil the book but telling you the end up front. Without question, with 100% certainty (barring injury), I'll tell you this:

Lebron James will win his first NBA championship this year.

* What a great end to the season. Remember folks...the NBA...it's FANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNTASTIC!!!!!